Control freak? Or just really, really scared of the unknown?
Turns out micromanaging everything doesn’t make you feel better.
I’m pretty sure nobody wakes up in the morning like, “You know what? Today I’m gonna be insufferably uptight and make everyone around me uncomfortable.” But, here we are.
Control feels great. Until it doesn’t.
It’s neat and tidy. Until it unravels.
Ever been around someone with zero chill? Exactly. Tight smiles, tight shoulders. Tight everything. Basically the human equivalent of jeans fresh from the tumble dryer…uncomfortable, stiff, slightly angry. Zip not zipping.
People get controlling because life is unpredictable. Unpredictable is risky. Risky feels unsafe. And feeling unsafe sucks.
So control steps in like a security blanket, promising safety if you just plan enough. Micromanage enough. Overthink enough.
Hate to say it but - life still goes rogue.
Sure, gripping onto life with white knuckles can work. For a bit. But for real? it’s bloody draining. For everyone involved. Nobody ever left a tightly-controlled scenario thinking, “Wow, what a vibe. Can’t wait to do that again.”
The weird thing is, the moment you loosen up, yes….shit hits the fan occasionally.
You forget appointments, someone lets you down, plans unravel spectacularly. New emotions and feelings might arise (usually the ones you were tryna avoid by being so rigid)
But sometimes unraveling is good. Sometimes messing up makes space. Space for something new. Something unexpected. Something weirdly…better?
I don’t have answers. I don’t think there’s a perfect line between control and trust. It moves. Constantly.
Maybe the real lesson is learning your own rhythm. Knowing when to hold tight and when to let go. It’s a dance you’ll probably never master completely, but isn’t that kinda the whole point?
Trusting yourself feels scary at first. Like closing your eyes and stepping forward, hoping the ground’s still there.
Sometimes it won’t be. You might faceplant?
But sometimes it’ll be a trampoline.
Bounce back. Laugh a little.
That’s way more fun, right?
Maybe control’s not the problem. It’s the thing underneath you don’t want to feel?
Krupa 🧡